June 2012
156 posts
Advertising Threat
steampoweredrocket:
SCREAMING
May 2012
112 posts
4 tags
6 tags
Reblog, go on your blog, and click the triangle.
I JUST SPENT LIKE AN 1 HOUR OF MY LIFE ON THIS, GENIUS
this is legit so sick.
5 tags
Multidisciplinary Works →
I forgot to tell you guys…I have an art tumblr. GO GO LOOK! GO!
pinkgloomyspriteevermore asked: Your sketches are superb. You're so talented.
filthyjarbushman asked: What is the air velocity of an unladen swallow?
filthyjarbushman asked: What is your quest?
filthyjarbushman asked: What is your name?
14 tags
STOP SCROLLING! I'm really bored, so reblog this...
The following quotations are taken from official...
Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
Witness: "I only have one, you know."
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Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
Witness: "By death."
Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
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Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
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Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
Witness: "July 15th."
Lawyer: "What year?"
Witness: "Every year."
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Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
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Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
Witness: "Er...his face."
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Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
Witness: "I forget."
Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
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Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
Witness: "Forty-five years."
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Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
Witness: "My name is Susan."
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Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."
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Lawyer: "What happened then?"
Witness: "He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
Lawyer: "Did he kill you?"
Witness: "No."
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Lawyer: "Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--"
Witness: "Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
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Lawyer: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
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Lawyer: "So you were gone until you returned?"
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Lawyer: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
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Lawyer: "Were you alone or by yourself?"
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Witness: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Lawyer: "Was this a male or a female?"
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Lawyer: "I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture."
Witness: "That's me."
Lawyer: "Were you present when that picture was taken?"
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Lawyer: "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
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Lawyer: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?"
Witness: "I'll be three months on November 8."
Lawyer: "Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "What were you doing at that time?"
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Lawyer: "She had three children, right?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "How many were boys?"
Witness: "None."
Lawyer: "Were there girls?"
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Lawyer: "You say that the stairs went down to the basement?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
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Lawyer: "What is your brother-in-law's name?"
Witness: "Borofkin."
Lawyer: "What's his first name?"
Witness: "I can't remember."
Lawyer: "He's been your brother-in-law for years, and you can't remember his first name?"
Witness: "No. I tell you, I'm too excited." (rising and pointing to his brother-in-law) "Nathan, for heaven's sake, tell them your first name!"
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Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?"
Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?"
Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?"
Witness: "No."
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Lawyer: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
Witness: "All my autopsies have been performed on dead people."
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Lawyer: "Were you acquainted with the deceased?"
Witness: "Yes sir."
Lawyer: "Before or after he died?"
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Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."
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Lawyer: "And what did he do then?"
Witness: "He came home, and next morning he was dead."
Lawyer: "So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?"
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Lawyer: "Could you see him from where you were standing?"
Witness: "I could see his head."
Lawyer: "And where was his head?"
Witness: "Just above his shoulders."
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Lawyer: "Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?"
Witness: "The victim lived."
coopranderson:
when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that’s
7 tags
Just a shout out to everyone.
If you are happy, for whatever reason, with how you are living your life. Regardless of how you came to be the way you are (medication, friends, sheer power of being awesome etc.), if you try to explain it to someone and they think it is wrong- DO NOT LET THEM CHANGE IT.
SERIOUSLY.
All that matters is that you are happy with yourself and that is all. You don’t need to please anyone.
...
If our parents could see our dashboards right now...
Lilo, why are you all wet?
daswiener:
captainhufflepuff:
This is actually heartbreaking when you remember Lilo tells Stitch her parents went for a drive, and the bad weather caused them to crash.
I always thought this scene was adorable
Wow thanks guy
Right in the childhood.
wonderstruck: Target has pledged $120,000 in cash... →
archer-and-anders:
Just saw this in an email from one of my professors who is an adviser for the Lesbian and Gay Vet Med Association at school. Target’s website says it will donate 100% of T-shirt sales from customers during the month of June to Family Equality Council.
See the t-shirts
If you love your mom, repost this. One girl didn't...
buggy-love:
c4nny:
Sorry followers, but I wouldn’t risk this.
i’m not risking this shit.
lol sorry guys
I think I’ve reblogged this before? Really, it’s because I honestly do love her.
5 tags
What happened when I finally convince my mom I...
Me: So....do I take these everyday...?
Mom: I don't know, call Wallgreens.
Me: *calls Wallgreens* No
Mom: It would probably cause addiction.
Me: .....so I can't take them everyday.....?
90% of people marry their 7th-12th grade love....
themanganinja:
caffeinated-artist:
h3art4che:
just to be safe….
I can’t afford a bad week, my final projects are here and I already hate my mondays.
I don’t want the middle of the week to start off horrible, it just started getting good
I was left no choice! Sorry followers.
A 90 years old man holds hands with his 40+...
When I was 16, I had a fake I.D. and decided to go...
yolo-tier:
welcome-to-the-sinners-ball:
imgayitsok:
God bless drag queens.
Reblog if you've seen Marvel's The Avengers
dynamodanibeth:
