CAFFEINATED ARTIST: Archive

I feel like I'll disappoint my parents if I don't have kids.

ferrets-over-cats:

My grandma has told me time and time again that before she dies she wants to see me “a grown woman, married, and with children”.

I don’t know if I’ll do any of those. She’s only 60 so she has all the time in the world, hopefully, but..

It’s troublesome.

Oh God, that’s a lot of pressure to put on someone D:

Grandmothers are funny like that though.

I bet mine wishes she’d see me in a dress before she died.

Hmm. This really depends on how you feel.
Still want a partner? Ace dating sites.
Still want kids? Artificial Insemination

Growing up? Well, that’s a completely different story. :)

Mar 31, 201216 notes

Mar 30, 201253,028 notes

Mar 28, 20125,987 notes

Mar 28, 201212,186 notes

The unfortunate truth.

POC: Hey uhm could you not do that thing? It hurts our community when you do that thing.
White Person: OH MY GOD WHAT
POC: I just - could you not -
WP: I CAN DO WHAT I WANT
POC: I would just really rather you not do that thing because it's racist -
WP: OH MY GOD STOP BEING SO SENSITIVE
POC: I mean, I've tried not to be sensitive for a really long time, but that really bothers me because -
WP: I'M NOT RACIST
POC: Well, that thing you're doing is racist, and -
WP: YOU'RE RACIST AGAINST WHITE PEOPLE
POC: what
Other White Person: Hey, can you shut the fuck up? It's racist and it's not okay. Please stop.
WP: ........
WP: IF IT'S RACIST WHY AREN'T POCS SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT IT

Mar 28, 2012418 notes

Mar 27, 201215 notes

"When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards." He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing."

buggy-love:

davegrohlsfacialhair:

sketchmonkey:

fedexlestrudel:

ourladyofwinter:

velociraider:

i-like-blue-boxes:

thenewfantastic:

criminallyobsessed:

hotel-denouement:

moral-highground:

yougotredonyou:

nicklex:

hannahisdead:

oh my god

BEST JOKE.

THIS JOKE SHALL BE TOLD FOREVER

Mar 27, 2012137,224 notes

If abortion and birth control become illegal

fangirlingforeverz:

prolongedeyecontact:

bebinn:

deathbysharpie:

What will happen:

sex

What won’t happen:

safe sex

What will happen:

abortion

What won’t happen:

safe abortions

Can’t put it much more simply than that.

#TRUTH

Yep.